Ünnecessary Ümlaut

UPDATE: REAL OR FAKE? ANSWER BELOW

Not as immediately satisfying as drunk Russian lady destroying grocery aisle or drunk guy putting on flip-flop, but worth a watch for sure. (Thanks, Wardinger)

Here’s a couple choice quotes. On why she comes to games:

“The wings. The beer deals. There’s like, usually like, hot guys that’re, like, up for anything”

::

On the girls who are with those hot guys:

“…Depending on what the girl looks like, I’ll just fight her”

::

On NPR:

“They should defunct that. What is this, Russia? … “

• •   • •

UPDATE: REAL OR FAKE? We’ve all been wondering if this was a joke. Finally, there’s proof. It was Kate James of Chicago area sketch comedy ensemble Schadenfreude. Well done, Kate.

• •   • •

HOWEVER, THESE DRUNK CUBS FANS ARE ABSOLUTELY REAL:

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