Ünnecessary Ümlaut

My wife was searching the For Sale section of Craigslist and spotting this screaming deal. Here’s what it said:

“I was having a snack when this odd nut ended up in my hand. … Other nuts of this rare shape have gone for thousands more. You know you want it. Grab my nut before someone else does.

One just like this sold for $500 on Ebay a few months back.”

C’mon. A nut that looks like a dong? Priceless. See if it’s still available. (Thanks, Mel!)