Ünnecessary Ümlaut


A surplus of geekery by :: Fred Abercrombie

Spooky: Miniature Golf in Basement of Ahlgrim’s Funeral Home

Yes, this is for real. And yes, it is so freakin’ awesome.

It’s the secretly infamous, miniature golf course Ahlgrim Acres, in the basement of Ahlgrim Funeral Home. On our recent Chicago trip we finally made it up to Palatine to experience this amazing, oddball gem. Originally built for their kids back in the 60s, the 9 haunted holes (complete with spooky music) are open to the public; when they’re not conducting services, that is. More info below.


Jump the skull!

August putting through the coffin. Notice the real estate sign on top, “Homes for living“.

The half-dozen video games and pinball machines are all free. Score!

Mel putting under a bloody scythe.

Fred putting into the Ahlgrim Cryptorium.

The Cryptorium has three grave obstacles you must avoid, or incur a two-stroke penalty for “disturbing a grave”.

Ahlgrim Acres has both cruise-ship shuffleboard and a bar-style shuffleboard table. Plus, pool tables and foosball. Yes, this place has everything you could wish for in a funeral home. Except beer.

Everett frozen with fear fun.

That ain’t mistletoe.

No minigolf course is complete without a windmill.

Spotted this diorama upstairs in the funeral home.

They just don’t do portraits like this anymore.

If you’re anywhere near Chicago call Ahlgrim’s and make an appointment to play golf. They’re super-nice folks. And it’ll give you one of the most random experiences ever.


201 N. Northwest Hwy
Palatine IL 60067
phone: (847) 358-7411
website: www.ahlgrimffs.com/golfcourse.htm

:: Twitter :: Facebook


20 Responses

  1. [...] This post was mentioned on Twitter by Bryan Irrera, Fred Abercrombie. Fred Abercrombie said: Spooky: Mini golf course in basement of Chicago funeral home http://bit.ly/5woDnO [...]

  2. [...] Spooky:  Miniature Golf in Basement of Ahlgrim’s Funeral Home   [...]

  3. Social comments and analytics for this post…

    This post was mentioned on Twitter by fredabercrombie: Spooky: Mini golf course in basement of Chicago funeral home http://bit.ly/5woDnO

  4. [...] This post was Twitted by sistermonkey [...]

  5. Dom says:

    Would really like to know when you opened the golf to the public? Opening a miniature golf to your kids in the 60,s, come on. It had to be in the 80′s , possibly late 80′s. Anyway idea’s are hard to come by, and Good luck.

  6. Todd says:

    I’m from palatine – I’ve been going there my whole life, especially when I have friends come into town. There’s nothing like the look on their faces when i tell them we’re going to play mini-golf, and then drive to a funeral home. :D We had my father’s funeral there, and they actually open up the course for the people attending the service. Weird and wonderful and probably the only thing in Palatine worth seeing.

  7. boris wakjyv says:

    Hole in the ground and hole in one!

  8. Phil E. Drifter says:

    Looks photoshopped.

  9. Kathy says:

    I took my kids here too about 10 years ago on a cross country trek from Reading, PA to Denver, CO. We had a blast and the owners are great!

  10. Ms. Tout says:

    Aw! I can’t believe I missed out! I was just in Palatine, and no one mentioned this gem..
    If you do make it up there Check out the Donkey Inn.. It a great little bar.. Good times GREAT Staff..

  11. Nora says:

    What the HELL?

  12. [...] (COED Magazine) The best mini-golf location of all time: the basement of a funeral home – (Ünnecessary Ümlaut) The business model of Somali pirates – (UN Dispatch) This guy decided to play through [...]

  13. [...] me, I’d want a funeral at the Ahlgrim Family Funeral Home in Palatine, Illinois. They have a miniature golf course in the basement! You can also play pinball and [...]

  14. Kratom says:

    Table tennis pool its all here, imagine your parents building this for you all while working on dead bodies..cool

  15. nice post , thank you for sharing

  16. seo essen says:

    That is just so wrong! lol
    It looks like kids can play golf while the adults do the crying for relatives….strange?!?

  17. allyourbasebelong2us says:

    I guess this is so that grandpa isn’t the only thing you can put into a hole in the ground when it’s time to go.

Leave a Reply