Ünnecessary Ümlaut

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A surplus of geekery by :: Fred Abercrombie

Craft Beerds: 14 Hairy Beer Labels

UPDATE: The response to this post led us to create a book, THE CRAFT BEERDS BOOK. Check it!

With Petaluma Whiskerino growing closer, and Lagunitas being one of the many homegrown supporters, we’ve got beer and facial hair on the membrane.

To celebrate, here’s a collection of our favorite Craft Beerds—label artwork graced by moustaches and beards.

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Moretti Moustache Man (old/new)

What’s changed? For starters, his Reverse Hitler ‘Stache has grown into a Flanders. Also, his de-aged design has given him the strength to hoist the mug of Moretti with noticeable gusto. Either way, glad they stuck with the man on the label. Referred to as, wait for it, “The Man on the Label”, he’s the official symbol of the Birra Moretti brand. A bit of his history via their site:

In 1942, Birra Moretti had already been a popular drink all over Friuli for over 80 years. One day, Commander Lao Menazzi Moretti saw a pleasant-looking old man with a moustache sitting at a little table in the Boschetti di Tricesimo inn (Udine).
He was just the kind of character Moretti had been looking for to represent the qualities and character of his beer: wholesome, traditional and authentic.
Commander Moretti didn’t let him get away. He went up to him and asked the man if he could photograph him and also asked him what he would like in return.
“Cal mi dedi di bevi, mi baste” – answered the man in Friuli dialect, which means “Get me a drink, that’ll do.” [See his photo]

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North Coast Brewing ‘Old Rasputin’

Up in my top favorite, most-satisfying stouts—among Goose Island‘s Bourbon County Stout, Mikkeller Beer Geek Breakfast, and Lagunitas Cappuccino Stout—is North Coast‘s Old Rasputin Imperial Stout. So rich. So good. So damn hairy.

RECOGNIZE THIS BEARD?

It’s The Homebrew ChefSean Paxton, in his Rasputin-y Twitter profile pic.

• •   • •

Shmaltz Brewing / Coney Island Craft Lagers
‘Human Blockhead’

That’s Donny Vomit, the man and legend on the Coney Island Human Blockhead label. Read how he got there at Village Voice.

Photo: Laure Leber

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Lagunitas Brewing Company ‘Joseph’s Best Brown Ale’

Not sure the date of this long-gone Lagunitas brew, but the label lists their address on Ross Street in Petaluma. So more than five years, at least. See the full label at BeerLabels.com.

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Avery Brewing ‘The Kaiser’

With the spike on his helmet, his ‘stache looks like the fletchings on an arrow. Yes, fletchings are the feathers on the end of an archery arrow. I had to look it up, too. We both learned something today.

Just nabbed a bottle of The Kaiser Imperial Oktoberfest from Avery in Colorado. Look for a review soon.

• •   • •

Shmaltz Brewing / He’Brew ‘Genesis Ale’

Nice Hasidic Beerd gracing the first ale from He’Brew.

• •   • •

Founders ‘Double’

Clever label. If only both views were hairy. Read about Founders Double at Ferment Nation.

• •   • •

New Glarus ‘Unplugged’

That’s brewmaster Dan Carey gracing the Unplugged series of ‘brewers choice’ beers from Wisconsin’s New Glarus Brewing Company. Release four times a year. Same ‘stache. Different brew.

Photo courtesy of the awesomely named Motley Brüe.

• •   • •

Half Acre Beer Company ‘Ginger Twin’

How rad is Half Acre? Aside from being in my motherland, Chicago, they ran one of the most badass promos ever for their Ginger Twin beer:

*Anyone with God given red hair will be granted an 8% discount on Ginger Twin purchases.
**Anyone with God given red hair and a Longshoremen’s beard will be granted a 10% discount on Ginger Twin purchases.
***Identical Twins will be granted a 15% discount on Ginger Twin Purchases
****Identical Twins with God given red hair will be granted a 25% discount on Ginger Twin purchases.
*****Identical Twins with God Given red hair and Longshoremen’s beards will be granted a special treat (each) and 50% off additional Ginger Twin purchases.

(via Grub Street)

• •   • •

Mikkeller ‘Big Worse’

Most of their beers feature the Danish brewing duo’s follicled faces somewhere on the label, but the Big Worse mugshot is one of the better treatments. Haven’t tried yet, but if it’s anything like Beer Geek Breakfast, I’ll be happy.

• •   • •

De Molen ‘Donder & Bliksem’

A mighty beard. A majestic head of hair. One good pair deserves another. De Molen‘s Donder & Bliksem (which means thunder & lightning) comes in two versions: the Dutch version, a Pilsner; the US version, a “Double Dutch Ale”. Go figure.

• •   • •

Morrissey Fox

Hairless Brits Neil Morrissey and Richard Fox sport Beerstaches on every label of their Morrissey Fox beer.

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Redhook ‘Big Ballard Imperial IPA’

This year Redhook introduced this as a nod to one of their first offerings, Ballard Bitter IPA, dating all the way back to ’84 when they were still brewing in an old Ballard neighborhood transmission shop. (Update: Thanks for the lüv, Redhook!)

• •   • •

Schloss Eggenberg ‘Samichlaus Helles’

Big white beards on Christmas beers aren’t a rare sight. With one exception—a beer that’s only brewed once a year, on December 6th—Samichlaus. The original and Helles versions of share the same bearded Santa Claus graphic (though I have an older version with just a North Star graphic). A Christmas tradition in the Abercrombie häus for sure.

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WHY YOU DON’T MESS WITH BEARD-ENHANCING DRUGS:

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Beer Güt Shirt

RELATED:
Blog Lüv: Thanks to Red Hook for the Hairy Beerd Care Package
Petaluma Whiskerino: Declare Your Independence From Shaving
Ongoing: A Collection of Facial Hair Collections
Drink: How the New Lagunitas Mason Jar Measures Beer
Every Everything: A Collection of Collections
Beer: Samichlaus Helles for the Holidays
Beer: Goose Island Matilda On Tap, Bourbon County Stout Now In Bombers!

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Beer: Pics of Bacon Beer, Burnt Toast Beer, and others at the Winter Brews Fest

Big thanks to Mario at Brewed For Thought for hookin’ up the Ümlaut at Beer Network’s Winter Brews Fest last Saturday.

I finally got to try Uncommon Brewers Bacon Beer. It was tangy, malty sweet, and even a little slick (pork fat, perhaps?). But not as bacon-y as I was dreaming for. Surprisingly subtle in the bacon dept., actually. I met the brewer, Alec, who gave official confirmation there is actual pork inside this brew—not the pork pictured above, that was Lagunitas Brown Shugga -injected Hog from Sean Paxton The Homebrew Chef.

Moonlight Brewing Burn Toast Ale smelled and tasted exactly that, but in a good way. Such a good way.

Jeremy Marshal and Tony Magee of Lagunitas tune things up.

Winner of Petaluma Whiskerino “Best Combo Beard/’Stache”, Shawn Spreng, holding a glass of Firehouse Grill Imperial Red Ale. One of my favorites of the afternoon. Right up there with Valley Brewing Decadent Darkness and Odonata Rosa (one of two sours I’ve ever wanted to have more of).

Petaluma represent! Fred flanked by Jeremy and Tony.

See the full slideshow and recap at Brewed For Thought »

RELATED:
“Hop Stoopid + Bacon” Beer Ice Cream at Humphry Slocombe
Beer: Lagunitas Now Offering Virtual Tastings
Yum: Maple Glazed Bacon Apple Dynamo Donuts
HowTo: Turbaconducken (Yes, Turducken Wrapped In Bacon)
Celebrate International Bacon Day
HowTo: Make A Flaming Bacon Lance of Death
Eat: Bacon-Infused Ice Cream & Pig Nipples

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Go: Bacon Beer ‘n More at Oakland’s Winter Brew Fest Saturday

I’ve been thinking about Bacon Beer ever since Mario from Brewed For Thought tipped me off last week. Finally, the day is upon us. Here’s four reasons to join us tomorrow!

  1. Bacon Beer from Uncommon Brewers!
  2. Lagunitas Brown Shugga-injected Hudson Ranch Heritage Pig Sandwiches from the The Homebrew Chef Sean Paxton!
  3. Rare brews from 40 local breweries and beyond (many 10% ABV and above!)
  4. Bacon Beer from Uncommon Brewers!

DEETZ:
Saturday, January 30 ~ 1pm to 8 pm

The Linden St. Brewery
95 Linden Street (@ West Embarcadero)
Oakland, CA

***UPDATE—SEE PICS FROM WINTER BREWS FEST HERE***

RELATED:
Beer: Lagunitas Now Offering Virtual Tastings
Yum: Maple Glazed Bacon Apple Dynamo Donuts
HowTo: Turbaconducken (Yes, Turducken Wrapped In Bacon)
Celebrate International Bacon Day
HowTo: Make A Flaming Bacon Lance of Death
Eat: Bacon-Infused Ice Cream & Pig Nipples

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